Talking to a particular client this week really got me thinking about how much our mind controls our actions, why is it we are able to commit to some things easier than others?
For example it is probably easier for someone to learn a new language but than to turn down food ? You would probably find it easier to say no to illegal drugs than saying no to your favourite pizza every Friday? Your able to motivate yourself enough to implement changes to advance in your career but you can’t seem to find the motivation to go for a 40 min walk every day? The more I thought about this the more my mind boggled. What is it in us that gives us more drive for external gain than internal healing and health?
The mind is undeniably a mighty force and some people seem to have a better grasp of it than others, when thinking about my past I came to the conclusion that;
WHEN YOU BELIEVE YOU CAN ACHIEVE SOMETHING YOU ARE MORE LIKELY TO TRY
THE MIND CAN THINK OF EXCUSES QUICKER THAN SOLUTIONS
ARE WE TRUELY BEING HONEST WITH OURSELVES?
DO WE FEEL WE DESERVE WHAT WE WANT?
Now before I continue I must add this is all my opinion, this is not science based and I am in no way telling you that you should always and only follow what I say. I try my best to speak from my own truth and want to encourage others to speak from theirs.
So think of the last thing you achieved, don’t think by others standards of what it means to achieve it could be anything from completing a college course to celebrating 1 year in a relationship. Now to achieve that thing how did you feel about it? Did you have a burning desire? When people said you couldn’t have it did you want to prove you could or did you let the words fill you with doubt? Now if that goal was switched to being your health what would you do to achieve it in the same way? Would you make a plan? Find support through a professional? join a group? And what is your reason WHY?
Now onto excuses, being a personal trainer and taking phone consultations I have heard every bloody excuse in the book and I can’t lie even the thought of some of them is pissing me off!!! but I respect the people who are honest enough to tell me the truth, 'I’m lazy, I can’t be bothered, I’d rather sit on the sofa after work, I don’t enjoy exercise, I feel embarrassed, I’m scared of failing again'. I respect the truth way more than an excuse because at least you are being honest with yourself and can find solutions to those problems.
So you want to sit on the sofa after a long day at work? Why not take your gym gear to work with you change into it and instead of going for a drink with your colleagues walk home or just half way to start with, or you could drop your things at home and head straight back out to the park and you then reward yourself with being lazy on the sofa after you have achieved your goal, or you feel like you need to be motivated by an outside source? Then book a personal trainer preferably me as i’m one of the best ;-) or ask a friend to check you go to the gym every Tuesday & Wednesday, download an app that keeps track of your activity, search for help online. When you really search for more solutions you tend to have so many options that the excuses dont have a leg to stand on. Now ask yourself why do you really make excuses and write down your honest answer!
Leading on to the question of Are you being truly honest with yourself? Sometimes due to culture, upbringing and environment we learn to portray what others expect of ourselves and unknowingly internalise others views and opinions of us.
It may sound strange but you can become addicted to being the victim and thrive off the attention. If no one has told you this it is crucial that you Stop giving a fuck about what other people think or feel! It breaks my heart that someone won’t go jogging in the park out of fear people will look at them soooooo what? when you start having health issues due to your junk filled diet those people won’t suffer, if you develop diabetes because of your binge drinking it doesn’t affect them and if your belly is now so big you can feel it slapping against your vagina well how are you going to get it any smaller by avoiding exercise? What if know body cared how much your body shook as you ran, God forbid they may not even notice you because they are focusing on themselves and the exercise they are doing! what if that man over there used to be the exact same size as you? & although his biceps are big, his chest is toned and appears to have everything you want; you dont know he still has loose belly fat that he hates but that doesnt stop him from doing all he can to stay healthy.
I know why I USED to care so much; it was because I was insecure and couldn’t stand to look at myself and felt others would be disgusted by the shape of my body. The only person judging me was Me! I told myself so many lies and began to believe every word, I didn’t feel pretty enough to be slim, I was the chunky sister, I’m meant to be big boned, I can’t stop eating, exercise doesn’t work for me, no matter how much I workout I won’t lose weight!!! Until the day came when I had to realise not only was I lying to myself but I was making up excuses because I was scared of failing and changing who I was. Now take a few minutes to note down the real reasons you haven’t made the changes you need to?
The last question I would like to ask you is Do you feel like you deserve what you want? If someone asked me right now if I think I deserve a £1000 that would be a easy yes but what about £500,000? Of course I would say yes but deep down I would be asking myself questions ‘will I be able to use this money wisely, Am I going to lose it, will people like me less if I have more money, what about if I make a bad investment, I’ve never had this much money, I’m scared someone will want to take it back, what about all the people with nothing and I’ve just taken a hand out & the list could go and on now this clearly shows I obviously have some internal issues to do with money and I’m not ashamed to admit I have many; as time goes by I am learning to change my mindset towards money and realise where my attitude stem from.
The same needs to be done when you think about if you truly think you deserve to have the body of your dreams and once you have honestly answered that ask yourself what you would be willing to sacrifice to have it ?
I hope I haven’t rambled on too much and fingers crossed something has resonated with you; I want you to feel empowered and spurred on to make some well needed changes in your life. If you have any questions or simply need someone to vent to please feel free to contact me at homefit4U@hotmail.com & I will respond as soon as I can.
Stay true to you xxx